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Joke of the Day

From: lourdes rodriguez [lrodriguez@qmpwlaw.com]
Sent: Thursday, October 09, 2003 9:43 AM
To: Bert Rodriguez (E-mail); Daniel Rodriguez (E-mail); Idania
Sanchez-Ruiz (E-mail); Miriam Rodriguez (E-mail); Tania Rehman (E-mail)
Subject: FW: I am certain that there is at least something with which
you will agree.



-----Original Message-----
From: Michael Ragan 
Sent: Thursday, October 09, 2003 9:39 AM
Subject: I am certain that there is at least something with which you
will agree.






What do you call a smart blonde?


A golden retriever.










What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?


45 lbs.





What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?


45 minutes.





What's the fastest way to a man's heart?


Through his chest with a sharp knife.





Why do men want to marry virgins?


They can't stand criticism.





Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and
good-looking?


Because those men already have boyfriends.





What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?


After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.





What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?


Are you sure it's mine?"





Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?


Breasts don't have eyes.










Where does an Irish family go on vacation?


A different bar.





What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?


A speech impediment.






What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?


A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage
along with a recipe.





How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... word?


Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!





What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?



A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale
begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

Thought of the Day


The powers delegated by the proposed Constitution to the federal government are few and defined. Those which are to remain in the State governments are numerous and indefinite. The former will be exercised principally on external objects, as war, peace, negotiation and foreign commerce. 
-- James Madison (1751-1836), Father of the Constitution for the USA, 4th US President - 
Source: Federalist No. 45